Monday, April 17, 2006

Ground Control To Major Who?

Does any one understand how much other nations laugh at us because we always have to whisper the word sex. Are we aware that by the age of eighteen the average child has seen 200,000 acts of violence and that's perfectly aceptable. At the same time, isn't a little ridiculous that the so called experts try to say that rologed exposure to sexual acts causes a rise in the viloent temperment of children? I'm not sure I catch that. I mean, I guess porn can be violent, but it never ends with someone's limbs being blown off or someone dying. And as snuff films were never realy legal to begin with, I'm fairly certain that the exposure to explict sexual material doesn't involve the denoument of someone getting stabbed at the end after the money shot.

These same people who are afraid of sex are the same people who ban these so called "curse words". Fuck, Shit, Motherfucker, Cocksucker.....they're just fucking words. They can't hurt any one. they do nothing but exclaim a feeling. I just don't understand what the big fucking deal is. Some would say I've become desensitzed towards the vulgar nature of these words. When the truth is, no matter who scatalogical they might be, these words tie back to sex. And it shows how fucking uptight we are in this country.
We're so uptight that we won't even let gay people get married or feel comfortable in their own skin. We're so uptight, that the mere utterance of any of the above words above, actually, fuck that, a mere allusion to the thought of something connected to the above words will get you fined.

They say it's "obscene".

obscene adj.
1)Offensive to accepted standards of decency or modesty.
2)Inciting lustful feelings; lewd.
3)Repulsive; disgusting: The way he writes about the disease that killed her is simply obscene (Michael Korda).
4)So large in amount as to be objectionable or outrageous: local merchants in nearby stores get hammered by stratospheric rents and obscene taxes

There's nothing offensive about a word or a fucking natural act. There's nothing lewd about talking about what's a perfectly acceptable human function. We're trying to teach our children that sex is repulsive and disgusting? For christ's sake, the fines being laid down on these people is obscene according to the above definition, not the actual "acts" the people are being accused of.

Obscene is the fact that the top 1/2 of the richest people in this country could feed to bottom 50. Obscene is that our movie stars and atheletes make more money in one season or on one movie then the salaries of some entire towns police, fire, and teaching departments combined. Obscene is the fact that our legislatures are shaming us into saying what they want us to based on the leadership in the religious right. Obscene is that millions of people a year die from disease, hundreds of thousands more from the debacle in Iraq, and wait where is all our tax money going? Obscene is the fact that we get to set up for the whole Bush administrations retirement fund through high gas prices this summer. Obscene is that the average child sees over 200,000 violent acts on TV by the age of 18, but seeing one remotely reference to sex is going to corrupt a child into a degenerate sex maniac.

I blame the media for most of this. And the internet. Because when I was a kid, (and my fathers a kid before that), we fund the secret stash, thought we were all bad ass, snuck a magazine to school so all your friends could see Madonna naked. Now it's proliferated everything. But that doesn't make it bad. It's just naked people fucking. Or just naked. Either way it's not harmful. It just is.

And meanwhile all of Europe laughs at us. "Look at the freest nation on Earth. And they get a little freaked by a naked body." I think most of my problem though is that if I were to make the decision to allow my children to watch something with sexual material in it i'm a pervert, a bad father. Whether I explain it all to the child or not. (Mind you I'm not making the judgement call here saying I would. But I think it should be much choice to allow my children to watch what I want to let them watch. WItht he proper guidence and talking, you could probably diffuse any of this. and no one can ague how quickly our children grow up today. Mostly as a factor of the society they grow up in. And I honestly don't think I would allow my children to see things I thought they couldn't handle. But that's my job. There's no rules books. If one parent thinks they've talked to their children enough and helped them differentiate fantasy from reality, and explained what sex is to a child and what it means...then that's their choice.) The point is all these fucking religious people are judging everybody. Judging me for swearing, allwoing swearing to be heard, allowing children to see whatever. judging everything and saying and telling us what is what and what SHOULD be what.

And in all this, they don't seems to see the irony in any of it.

I mean, there's all that stuff in the Bible about judging isn't there? Isn't judging bad?

Well let me judge for a second here.

Fuck off.

Stop telling me what is embarrassing and what I should be afraid or embarassed to say or think.

I'm tired of everybody laughing at us because people can't handle a naked breast or a penis or vagina exposed. (I mean... it's just a body part people.)

Aren't you?

Currently listening :

Exile in Oblivion
By Strung Out
Release date: By 02 November, 2004

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Holding it all together while we all just fall apart.

I'm moving to Cambridge in approximately 2 weeks. The last time I moved was around two years ago around this same time. I hate moving more then anything, so when I do move if for all the right reasons. So now I begin to reflect back on the last couple of years. While none of us should look to the past and revel in it, it's kind of interesting o see where we were and where we are. It's weird to think I was in such a different headspace even two years ago. People who caused me grief and anguish I either don't think about any more or have made my peace with.

My worries of going from a job I loved (but was wholly uncomfortable at....and now can be told where for entirely different reasons than was aware of at the time) to a job I know I was going to hate but could handle beyond competency have reverted back to a job and company I am so excited to work for again. Many of the factors that brought me to be in lowest place of my life thus far five years ago have all dissapated/come full circle to reverse themselves from negatives to positives. It's just bizarre how so many things change so quickly.

The strangest thing really is the friends I've made and lost over the last five years. (Actually lost is a strong word. I'm not sure that I've lost friends but rather lost contact with them.) Five years ago I was at a point where I didn't need anything, didn't want anything. And then I gained a whole new respect for people you meet through life. But it also made me jaded because these people we meet sometimes become trasient. And no matter what you say or how you try to keep up with them, it just doesn't happen. And that makes you sad. And then you have other friends who change with their own times. And you find you have very little in common with them as you thought you did in the beginning. And the messages and phone calls become less and that's not really anybodies fault. I guess it just happens. And you also have those people who were just fake all along. ANd so your better off forgetting they exist.

I guess what I regret is the fact that I don't talk and hang out with people like I once did. And maybe moving will change that. And maybe it's just that everybodies schedules just aren't working out. But there was a time that, as short in the grand scheme of things as it may seem, I was probably more comofrtable then I've ever been in my life. And people's priorities change and their live's changes and their jobs change, and they should because that's what life ends up being about. And while I wish things were the same they aren't and for most instances won't ever be. But i do miss the times I spent with alot of those people.

At this point this has become some emandering,w andering monologue trying to find sense in the jumpled thoughts I had when I woke up. But what I do know is that everytime I make a big change I feel like something really big is right around the corner. I've a;lways been somewhat dissapointed in not taking adavntage of those situations in the past.

This next month or so feels like another turning pint. Except I get this weird precognition that the next year or two or five, won't turn out to be that dissapointment. Lots of big things happening.

I've recently learned it's all right to be selfish. Don't hold it against me when I am.

Currently listening :

The Future Of What
By Unwound
Release date: By 21 April, 1995

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

We're not talking because you've got nothing to say.

Change is good.
Keep telling yourself and you'll be one step ahead of the rest of the rat race.
Metaphor for human kind.
What disgusts most, interests me but is that wrong?
Couldn't tell so i walked away.
Things become the same sometimes so we alter their existence in just the slightest way.
And as things die, new things are born.
Skin dies.
So you shed it and grow into your new one.
I can't hear with the yelling going on.
For just a second.
Hear that?
It's your future waving goodbye.
But only if you believe that to be true.
Fuck it, what do you have to lose.
Don't talk, just listen.
And pretty soon, everyone will forget you're around.
Change is good.
Don't make a sound.
Don't forget what made you what you are.
And even if you want to thank those people who helped you?
Don't because they're not listening anyways.
I had enough friends anyways.
As much as I may miss the one's who don't talk anymore.
Because they forgot I was listening.
Does that mean I value the new ones even more?
Because I stopped making a sound?
Why haven't we talked for more than 30 seconds?
Is it that we don't interest each other at all?
Or we're scared that we interest each other too much?
Why is it always easier to listen to yourself typing the words, then actually saying them?
Is that how we're most comfortable?
We're all most comfortable?
Introverted extroverts are the new shy people.
When will I get one step ahead?
Why do I always feel one step behind?
Change is good.

Currently listening :

Those Who Tell the Truth Shall Die, Those Who Tell the Truth Shall Live Forever
By Explosions in the Sky
Release date: By 04 September, 2001