As the first of two weddings approach that I will be attending for the week, I'm constantly reminded and bomabarded mostly by family memebers of when I'm going to get "a nice girl" and "settle down". I'm so fucking sick of this talk I want to explode. As I get older, I begin to think more and more that marriage and relationships and all that shit just isn't for everybody. A friend recently referred to my current attitude towards women and relationships and the like as being "emotionally retarded" but I don't think that immaturity and a lack of need to commit to something are mutally exclusive. It's not even that so much, as...I see all these people limping in their so-called relationships, and then I hear people whining about finding their one person blah blah fucking blah and I want to say get the fuck over yourself. Some friends have called it being picky but I don't even think of it on that level anymore. Yeah, I guess i could settle for the first thing that shows me intrest, but I'm so dead set against ending up not happy that a refuse to settle. I don't know why people make things so fucking difficult. What's wrong with being interested in someone and getting to know them. I do envy my friends getting married this weekend in this, thyey've been involved in their relationships long enough to know their doing the right thing. I'm so tired of these labels and contradictions on what people put on what theya re. Boyfriend girlfriend, dating, seeing each other, going steady, what the fuck ever you call it, it justs eems like some need that we have to prove to our parents in some socialogical way, that our staus is in tow with the rest of the way everything supposed to line up. EVen if you label it as "friends with benefits" or whatever you want to call that whole thing, haven't you at least but some sort of inverstment in the other person. Doest it even have to be anymore than that? I'm just completely not complcit in follwoing what we are supposed to do by societies standards when referring to all this relationship bullshit. I don't understand why amazing converstions with girls have to lead to anything more than more amazing conversations. I don't know what happened to the days where we could just let thngs go as they may. If it mean follwoing some faux standard that's been provided to us through books and media and what's presented as what we should do, I'd rather just be alone.
Currently listening :
By Dillinger Escape Plan
Release date: By 14 October, 2003